Looking around at Mountain View, it pretty much appears that a person has to be married in order to be used by God. Only the married people are respected. Only married people can be in leadership. Only married people can make an impact. Are these some lies that we, as singles, have believed? Have we been limiting the impact we can make at our own church, because we have somehow believed that we are lesser Christians who don’t have a place to serve? I have been extremely challenged in this area lately, and have come to the conclusion that I am guilty of adopting this dangerous mentality.
It is a lie that has somehow affected our thinking. By merely looking around, we see a church body made up of those who are married, and can sometimes draw the conclusion that a person has to be married before they can make an impact for Christ. From these observations, the tendency is to develop an inward focus that quickly leads itself to mediocrity in our spiritual lives. It’s easy to have the false concept that when we are married, then we can make an impact for the Lord. The question we really should be asking ourselves is, “How am I making a difference now?”
Single men and women throughout the history of the church have had an amazing impact! Corrie ten Boom led an exiting life of adventure as she helped many Jews escape the Nazis during World War II. C.S. Lewis was unmarried when he wrote Mere Christianity, which has impacted the lives of millions. Also, if it weren’t for a single person (Paul) making an impact in the church, we wouldn’t have half of the New Testament… or for that matter, a Savior! Despite what Dan Brown and others say (those who are overly infatuated with twisting the Scriptures and inventing theories on Leonardo da Vinci’s work), Jesus was single and He certainly had a place in the church. So, marriage certainly isn’t a prerequisite for church involvement!
If we are totally honest with ourselves, have we adopted the thinking that we can’t make a difference? I want to encourage all of us to reach out to the body at Mountain View. To look for ways to serve… this may even mean to start a ministry that is your very own. How has God gifted you? What are you passionate about? I was talking to a college student and a young married just recently, and unfortunately they both felt that the singles at MVCC can sometimes come across as unfriendly and unwelcoming. I know at times, I can be too caught up in myself to where I overlook the opportunity to serve others… or even just to be friendly by saying hi to someone I’ve never met.
The book, Seeking the Face of God, by Gary Thomas, has challenged my thinking regarding service and ministry. He says,
“God must do a work in us before He can work through us… If I am steeped in habitual sin, if I remain a spiritual adolescent, I cannot threaten hell, not while kissing its feet or lusting after its trinkets…As singles, let’s step out in faith and see how God can use us! Let’s actively pursue serving others and finding ways to make an impact at our church! As we strive to do this, we will see God working in our lives. He will reveal more of Himself to us and bring a lasting joy and contentment that is only found in submission to Him. We can make an impact! If we will seek to be godly men and women following hard after the Lord, we will not only be used in incredible ways now, we will be much more prepared for the future He has for us… whether we are single or married!
Have we refused to deal with needy issues in our lives, perhaps denying they exist, and therefore blinded ourselves to the needs and hurts of others? Or have we just become lazy, content to coast into heaven rather than be faithful servants?
This goal, to love God so much that we overflow with love for others and consequently see hell break apart at our feet, encourages us to press on to be the type of person God can use consistently and powerfully. The goal is also clearly defined by a central question: Are people around us being changed?”
~AF
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