One way to get what you desire...

I read a post recently from a friend’s blog. She’s always been very transparent and yet continues to have a sense of humor in the midst of difficulties. Here’s what she wrote that caught my attention,

“It is hard to be 33 and single.  It's hard to watch people much younger than me get married and have kids.  It's hard to be completely content one day and be so lonely I could die the next day.  It's hard to face the reality that most likely I'm not going to get to have children. It's hard to hear all of the well meaning things that (married) people throw my way whenever I start talking about being single.  As if someone who got married when they were 23 knows anything about being single.  I hate it when people use the verse about God giving you the desire of your heart if you delight yourself in Him.  As if somehow my life is a disappointment to God, which is why I'm still single.  Or why they finally were blessed with marriage - because they figured out the key to delighting themselves in God and were subsequently blessed with the golden chalice of marriage and now they just want to encourage me to do the same thing.  I could hit those people and one of these days, I just might.  Or unfriend them on facebook. I'm good at that too.”

Have you ever heard this verse quoted in the context of singleness? Is it true that the secret of finding a spouse is delighting in God? Is that what Psalm 37:4 talks about?... getting what I want if I delight in God? Well, not quite. The verse says,

“Delight yourself in the Lord; 
And He will give you the desires of your heart.”

We like to twist this verse to the point of it being some mystical path to getting all our hopes and dreams. In reality, it’s really the opposite... well, sort of. As we delight (put first, seek, pursue) in the ways of the Lord, He changes not the circumstances into what we want, but our desires of wanting what He wants and how He directs the circumstances. We serve a God who, in spite of how we feel at times, really does want us to have joy and peace… and who doesn’t want joy and peace? In the end, as we delight in Him by giving over our desires and giving up our dreams, the Lord transforms our desires into His desires, which brings us a joy we never thought possible through submission to Him. Yea, God is pretty powerful in that way… bringing about that which we truly long for, but in a way that is opposite of how we would think. The secret of joy is in yielding, not in holding on to what we want.

John MacArthur simplifies this verse in a way that is really profound…

So, how do you get what you desire? Yield your desires over to Him, and He will give you what you long for. Once you are following the Lord in humility, submission, and obedience (and that is key!), do whatever you want! :-) As you do what He wants, He changes your desires so that what you want is what He wants, too. Crazy!

~AF