It really wasn't that long ago, but when I think back, it seems like it was ages ago. A lot can change in the course of three years!
The house I had purchased became the ultimate bachelor pad. Late night Rock Band parties (complete with a ginormous stage equipped with neon lights and a smoke machine), a 65" 1080 HD TV, and a hot tub (that was accompanied by friendly yellow rubber duckies that never quite learned how to swim). The hang-out house was given the nick-name, "Casa de Florea." It was great! My two roommates and I were three happy bachelor dudes with not a care in the world. Well, other than figuring out who was going to clean up the dirty dishes from the night before.
Two of the three bachelor dudes met girls. Then the girls became girlfriends who became serious girlfriends (you see where this is going?). These serious girlfriends became fiancees who became wives. As my two roomies progressed in their relationships with these girls, I continued to remain quite single. One of the roommates got married and moved out... to be replaced by another great guy. This guy met a girl whom he started to date... and I'm sure you can guess the rest. Yup, I had 3 roommates over the course of about a year and a half who moved into Casa de Florea completely single and available to walking down the aisle saying "I do" in record-braking time. What it was about my house, I have no idea, but all I do know was that I was, once again, betrayed by a fellow bachelor dude-roommate to go live with a member of the opposite sex. The joke around town was quickly spreading, "If you want to get married, move into Alex's house! HA!" Many guys came running for miles to live with me in hopes they, too, could meet the woman of their dreams and live happily ever after. There I was... in my early 30's, single, and all alone. *cue the sad violin music*
Why do I share this depressing story with you? It's because last week in our Monday evening Bible study, we talked about the subtle sin of discontentment. We discussed how discontentment is a restless longing for better circumstances. It's dissatisfaction or thinking that something is just not enough. We can easily struggle with discontentment as it relates to a difficult job, finances that are tight, or physical features about ourselves we don't like. In my situation, it was easy to fall into the sin of discontentment by looking at my situation and questioning God's plan for my life. When I was at home hanging out with my roomies and their lady friends, subtle (and dangerous) thoughts would often come to mind... "you'll never get married." "You've missed your chance." "You'll never be happy like they are." A wrong perspective feeds lies and ungodly thinking, which quickly leads to discontentment and wishing our circumstances were different.
In our study, I read a quote that said, "God does nothing, or allows nothing, without purpose." But is this really true? What about earthquakes and tsunamis? What about when I make a bad decision and suffer the consequences? What about when everyone around me is getting married and I still long for my life-long companion? The Biblical answer is an emphatic YES! Everything God does AND allows has a purpose. We discussed verses that talk of God's sovereignty... that He is all-powerful and does as He pleases for His own glory (Prov. 16:9; 16:33, Prov. 21:1, Psalm 115:3, Is. 46:9,10, Daniel 4:35). Nothing can thwart or stop His ultimate plan. Not the weather, not an unforeseen accident, not even sin that we commit. Isn't that a comforting thought? Not even our sin can stop God from accomplishing His ultimate plan. That does not mean we can live however we desire and expect things to go well for us. God still calls us to obedience, but even when our sin enters the picture, God can take that situation and use it in our lives for good.
In the realm of singleness, it's most often not the result of sin in our lives (although that can sometimes factor in). A lot of times, it's just that, well... we're single! God has allowed our circumstances for a reason. We may not know all the answers to our questions, but we can be assured that the Lord is a good God and that He is in control. We can only find true contentment and peace when we yield to God's sovereignty and accept that He has purpose in circumstances that seem hopeless.
As I learned how to better trust the Lord, I found great joy in my singleness... even in the midst of my closest pals getting married. It's not our circumstance but our perspective that leads to freedom. And often times, as we learn what God is teaching us in the midst of those hard times, He then works in ways we did not see coming. In my case, He brought a beautiful woman into my life who is now my wife ("Casa de Florea" is now "Florea la Chateau"). Being married or having what we think we want is not what brings contentment... it's all about developing a firm faith that God has a plan and a purpose in whatever we are going through. A quote from our study said, “It is SO important to develop a firm belief in the sovereignty, wisdom, and goodness of God in ALL the circumstances of our lives.” When we accept this, we move from an attitude of victim to an attitude of stewardship. We should ask the question, “God, how can I use this circumstance to serve and glorify You?”
~AF
No comments:
Post a Comment